Fife: So Long 2013

Fife Friends, So Long 2013…

Well, one thing I can say is that I am thankful for Veronique MacRae. This is not to discount my other sisters and friends (so don’t take this personal) but she has been an consistent ROCK. In the beginning of the year, I was fighting along with so many others looking for a job, and trying not to let my $100,000’s in student loans depress me and all my degrees feel like a waste of time. V (what I call her) along with so many others decided not to let me stay in the dumps. She forced me to do a vision board, and to start my paperwork for my non-profit!!! (Yes, I will open it in the next few years, it’s in the works!!!!) Saying all that to say, this last entry of the year is dedicated to our friendship!!! Thanks for telling me to write, even when I felt like my writing was not professional enough, and thanks for believing in me and holding me accountable! So yes V!!! I made it and I’m doing my last entry of the year like I promised!!!!

Lessons big and small…

Fries Update: Only Burger!!!! YES GAWD!!! They make some unbelievable home fries. They make them fresh to order and when I get the large it often feels like I need one more order!! They are brown and CRISP!!! Not over cooked and when I get home they are still warm!!! YIPPEEEE!!!! From watching the chef’s through the glass it seems as if they have a special combination seasoning that they throw on the fries right after they are cook!!! AWESOME!!! The customer service there is AMAZING!!! J They also have FAN-TAB-ULOUS burgers!!! My favorite is the Turkey burger on wheat bread with crispy bacon. Even though the other day they were out of wheat bread :/ & yes, I almost cried over the phone as I placed my order. They also have prime beef, lamb, veggie burgers, and many more. So if you get a chance head over to Only Burger and check them out!!!! My favorite time to eat there is on Sunday nights after church when I don’t want anything to hardy!!!! They are a little on the expensive side but hey they are gourmet!!!

Married Life:

My husband is like the most amazing man ever!!! I knew I loved him when I married him, but G-GOLLY, life with him is so much better and I fall more in love with him as we continue to share our lives together. Even though I fuss at him sometimes for overworking and get mad at him for making me eat dinner by myself, I truly realize that he has sacrificed so much for us!!! And I appreciate that he is always willing to compromise and put in a plan in place to make me happy!!! (Yes, he spoils me and I am comfortable with it!!! HA) He is a wonderful provider and I could honestly not ask for a better husband. We travel, we laugh, we cook, and we throw amazing events!!!

Work Life:

UGHHHHHHH lol… well it has gotten better. With the help of a wonderful mentor, I now get to work part time at a counseling office!!! Praise the Lord!!!! But I still have to keep my main job, which has driven me quite POSTALLLLLLLL!!!lol!! I had a supervisor tell me I was a un-achiever because I did not perform a task to his liking. WoW right??? My heart was sooo heavy, because he honestly put words to how I have been feeling this entire year. Not having the dream job I thought I would have, not making the 6 figure salary that goes along with my Duke degree, not being able to open my transitional home, having to put my non-profit on hold, not feeling as if I fit in at church, struggling with belief & doubt, figuring out how to manage money, feeling as if some of my friendships have failed, struggling with writing correctly, and having to relearn grammar tidbits... it spoke to what I had been feeling but was afraid to say Jha you are NOT WHERE YOU SHOULD BE… You should be further along, you should have more in savings, you should be helping more, saving more of the world, making a difference…etc.

After talking with my husband and Jesus, I realized that I may not have achieved what I thought I would in the amount of time that I put on it, but that does not mean I have not achieved anything. I had to go back and look how far I have come with being confident when I walked into a room, being perfectly comfortable in my skin. I was able to go on several interviews, gain two jobs, maintain a healthy marriage, draw closer to my family (Hey MANI & TACO TUESDAY TURN UP), travel to New York (My Favorite Place), watch amazing friends get married (YAY Krystle & Ray/ Tamika & Mike), be able to dine and be blessed by friends (KWAME, MARCIA, ZEBRA), I also am now a Godparent to two beautiful ladies (My loves Shaelynn & Kennedy Godmommy loves you), congratulate my sister on getting accepted to Bennett College & Thailand study abroad program… I mean the list goes on.

I realized that sometimes in Fife, people speak death to your life. People want to remind you of all your bad choices and not congratulate you on your good choices. People want to remind you of your past and laugh at your progress. Sometimes people speak death to you because they feel dead inside and it’s really not a reflection of you or about you.

I am not sure what made my supervisor say those words to me, but like I had to be reminded, I would like to remind many of you who are struggling with the words that people have spoken over you that you are replaying in your head that its not the end. Your story is not over, my story is not over. Even though this year is over, your life is not and it will continue!!! You should be reminded that people spoke death over Jesus. They ran, cried, and mourned his death. They even wrapped his body and put him in a tomb, but in 3 days he got up, and he got up with ALL POWER IN HIS HANDS!!!! Yes, he died, yes he was hung high, yes it was painful, and yes he bled!!! Yes, you may have had to be on food stamps, yes you may have been laid off, yes you may have had to move in with friends or relatives, yes you may have lost your car, yes you may have foreclosed on your house, and yes you may have gotten a divorce, but its not over!!! So I end with this in 2013 to the supervisor who wanted to speak death over me…. Watch me RISE in 2014!!!

Lessons Learned Over the Phone

The Many Lessons learned over the PHONE!!!

So after being refocused, I began making more calls and people began calling me back. I went from being embarrassed to be prepared and knocking the calls out the park. Even though at this moment they have not resulted in employment they have boosted my self-esteem, gave me assurance, and even direction. I hope these moments help you not make some of the mistakes as me!!

The Bad Call

First call, that I learned from that went a little like this:

Contact person: call this lady name Shannon…tell them I sent you they will help you out!!!!

Me: Okay … is that it?

Contact Person: YUP!

Me: U sure?

Contact Person: Yup!

Me: okay…

Me: Hello Im calling to speak to Shannon

Shannon: This is she

Me: Hello Shannon I was referred to you by Rita, she stated that you work in job placement

Shannon: Yes what are you looking for

Me: A full time job

Shannon: Well, what kind of job?

Me: A full time job

Shannon: Okay what kind of job?

Me: A full time one

Shannon: (PISSED AND VOCALLY IRRITATED) I KNOW you are looking for a full time job but what kind, what do you have experience in?

Me: Oh (Voice a bit shaky because I knew this conversation was going down hill) well I have experience in humanities and social services

Shannon: We don’t do job placements for that, we don’t do humanities and non profit. We work with HR, administrative assistance, more corporate offices etc.  but if you fill out a profile online you never know. Have a great day.

Me: You too

Shannon: CLICK

Contact person: Oh I thought you were looking for an administrative assistant position..

ME: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I learned so much from this embarrassing conversation.

First Off:

Anyone who is assisting me in the job search must know what I am looking for. I must clarify and get clarity on any referral.

            -Who is this person you are referring me too?

            -What position and company is this for?

            -What is this company known for?

            -What is the company website?

            -Why do you think this would be a good fit for me?

I was embarrassed because I did not know what I was getting myself into… NOT SMART!!!! I should have been able to tell her exactly what position I wanted based off the position I should have researched that she was offering. I must/ You must always be in the position of having the upper hand. This means, know what the answer to the question before you ask the question. Know the answers to the questions she/he will ask. Nothing should ever catch you off guard during these moments.

When she asked what job am I looking for, my answer was true and honest out of desperation. In my head I am thinking that I don’t want a temp job or a part time position, I want a full time job with benefits doing ANYTHING. Did she need to know that information? OF COURSE NOT!!!! J

Now knowing, I should have answered her like this:

I am looking for a position that offers administrative support. Whether that is through and administrative assistant position, case manager, or any position offering support in administration.

Now is this is my I need to do what I have to do answer without sounding desperate and foolish. Searching for a job has enough stress and shame that one does not need to invite more of it by being ill prepared and making everyone uncomfortable and embarrassed.

The Great Call (lol… sounds like the great commission…my fellow theologians will get it)

I got a call from a contact at one of my top 5 non-profits I want to work for, YES!!,  the Children’s Home Society. I love working with foster care kids, adoption agencies, intervention programs, youth ministries, etc. That’s my passion. I believe that childhood really lays a foundation for life. 18 years impacts the rest of the 80 you may live. Isn’t that crazy?

That is why intervention and prevention programs are sooo important. If kids knew at a young age that they can be successful no matter what, I believe they will achieve success. Unfortunately, when young people grow up with is THUG LIFE or DRUG LIFE (no matter the race) that’s all they aspire to be. But being a doctor, lawyer, teacher, social worker, nurse, engineer, or project manager is much cooler!!! J

Lisa: Hello Jhaniqua,

Me: Yes, Hi its great to talk to you

Lisa: Yes, you were referred to me by Rachel

Me: Rachel is an amazing person. I worked for her as an intern a few years ago. But since then I have graduated with my masters from Duke University. I started working with foster care kids in a home near Fayetteville and I loved it!!! I fell in love with working at that place. I recently got married, had to leave my job and relocate.

Lisa: Oh, great so are you still looking for employment?

Me: Yes, actually I am. I have been looking at non-profits that would allow me to continue to work in the same area. While researching companies, your company the Children’s Home Society continued to pop on my radar.

Lisa: Great!!! So have you looked on our website where the jobs are posted?

Me: (SMILING INSIDE) Actually I am signed up on your list serve for Job alerts and I have applied a few times for the foster care specialist position. Do you have any suggestions on how to gain employment with the Children’s Home Society?

Lisa: Oh good!!! Well I would suggest that you continue to check back with the website and make sure that you are completely filling out the entire profile online. Make sure your application is complete.

Me: Yes, I will do that, would you recommend that I go back to school to get an MSW?

Lisa: Remind me of your education again?

Me: I have a masters in Divinity with a significant amount of course work in Christian education and I have a bachelor’s degree in counseling and religion.

Lisa: Cool, yeah, no the MSW is preferred not required, I think you should be fine.

Me: (EXCITED) Really? Well great thanks sooo much. I really appreciate you taking the time to talk to me.

Lisa: No problem. I know we are not hiring now for the Greensboro office, but I will ask around and get back to you!!!

Me: Thank you sooo much you have a great day!!

Lisa: You too!!!

Lessons Learned:

-I am sooooo excited recalling this experience. It was just what I needed, to be reassured in my education and experience.

-I was also prepared. I knew about the company! I knew about the hiring positions! I was already connected with their list serve. I was prepared with questions. This conversation flowed. It didn’t seem so much as an informational interview verses as a natural conversation for me to gain more information about this company and potential future employer.

-When you call companies and doing phone informational interviews or even networking over the phone, prepare just as much as you would if you were going into an office for an interview.

-Also, its not all about who you know, but who knows you. Hopefully, during this conversation I made such a good impression upon her, that when a job comes available she will remember me and the pleasant conversation we had, hopefully, she will share with her supervisors or the hiring managers about me!!! That’s the key. Even though I have not heard back, I feel like Joseph waiting in prison, one day She will remember me and I will be in the PALACE!!!

Peace, Blessings, and ENJOY FRIES WITH LIFE!!!!!

Refocused Yet Prepared

Refocused Yet Prepared

I appreciate and love music PERIOD. I love music because I can dance to it, eat to it, drive to it, listen to it, tap my feet to the beat of it, and connect with others with it. Most of all I love music especially Gospel or Christian music because I am able to leave this earthly dwelling and be in heaven for a moment. I am able to connect with God, be with God, love on God, and receive the LOVE of GOD.  While in church last Sunday at OG (Orange Groove, Durham, NC) Korwind Stokes the minister of music there along with the praise team began to minister a favorite: IM CHASING AFTER YOU… let me pause and share the lyrics:

I’m chasing after you, no matter what I have to do

Cause, I need you more and more…

More and more…

I’m chasing after you

I’m praising my way through

Just to be closer to you

I’m chasing after you…

Now for my fellow Christians out there (#PRAISE HIM rt!!!!) you may identify with me, being unemployed and needing a job, you can find yourself chasing. Chasing people trying to network, chasing job after job, lead after lead, chasing websites, all the while God is saying:

HELLO I can open doors that no man can shut,

HELLO have you ever seen the righteous begging for bread (Psalm 37:25),

HELLO I provide food and shelter for the birds of the air why would I not do anything less for you? (Matthew 6:26)

…darling stop chasing everything else, seek me first and all other things will be added unto you. (Matt 6:33)

Well, while the tears began to stream down my face, because I could hear the Holy Spirit speaking so clearly, Jhaniqua began to rise... conversation went a little something like this:

Well Lord, like, that’s great to seek you, but it’s hard to seek you when a way is not made.  It’s hard to feel like you are providing when I feel like I am begging, on all sides. I know I’m supposed to be chasing you, but God do you not see the heartache, shame that’s taking place?

Yes, I know the saints love to shout off of IF HE DOESN’T DO ANOTHER THING HE HAS DONE ENOUGH, howeva (neck roll) saints let’s be REAL. If you lost your job, family, money, shelter, and was begging, you too would have questions for the Almighty God. Many of us are like Job’s friends or even Job’s wife; we too are sitting by the brook in ashes wondering what the HECK IS NEXT. Now I’m not saying that this would take away from God’s Goodness, Sovereignty, because whether I’m poor or rich God is still God.

As I tried to deny myself to be able to receive what the Holy Spirit wanted to impart in me, speak to me and share divinely with me; the Holy Spirit kept ministering to me, yes its great to learn, its amazing to connect with people, you need to have a well written resume, you need these things, but I’m here to help you refocus. Turn your focus back on your purpose, your love for God, and your passion for God’s people. I know darling it’s hard but seek God, love God, and everything will fall into place.

Ladies & Gent’s I promise it all clicked in my head at that moment. Yes, its sooo true. All my prayers for the past few months have been nothing but touching the garment of Jehovah Jireh. Jesus please provide in this way, please pay this bills, please do this and do that. The love was kinda put on the back burner. Sorry JESUS!!! J I do love U, but it’s hard to really focus on love when your phone is being bombarded by 1888-I-WANT MY MONEY!!!!! Lol…

But its true, when you seek God just to love Him, and He loves on you, its just like calling my husband just so that he knows I’m thinking about him. Same concept. If I kept asking Sean to just do stuff but never expressed my love to him whether the task was completed in 5 minutes or the next day, I KNOW he would get agitated very quickly… SHOOT I WOULD TOO!!!

Lesson learned: I am refocusing. I’m now gazed on God. Waiting, listening, reading my word, praying and just spending time in worship. Does this allow me to negate all the information I have learned, or that I will stop attending classes, or stop perfecting my resume, NOPE!!! ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!

So where does this put me… back to resume writing…lol

Resume 101: Basics

·      Your resume is like your golden ticket. It introduces you before you are seen. It must be innovative, captivating, clear, concise, and quickly but descriptively describe your past work.

·      Each resume MUST be tailored to the specific job. WHY? I know its aggravating and time consuming but…

o   Each position and each job needs something different. Hiring managers for electrical engineers and pastoral hiring committee will look for two different things. This is not to say that a pastor can not be an electrical engineer or vice versa, but the wording, and your past job duties will need to be tailored differently.

o   Your describing words will change.

o   Your duties will need to be tailored. Applying for an administrative position you will need strong organizational skills and computer skills. So your previous work experience must reflect that. Applying for a director position, your previous work experience must reflect previous managerial experience.

·      Keep things centered: Sometimes hiring managers get hundreds of resumes. They may only have 6-10 seconds to look at each one. If your information is not centered or if its not laid out well, you will quickly be looked over.

·      Education: Once I graduated from Duke University, I felt like that was the best asset on my resume WRONG. For some people it was a turn off because they did not like Duke or because I was applying for something that having a graduate degree was not beneficial. Place education at the bottom, nothing too big but or too fancy for example:

            Masters of Education, Duke University

Verses

MASTERS DEGREE IN EDUCATION

DUKE UNIVERSITY

Don’t laugh at me, I know I am not the only one out there…lol… a little over kill but you get the point.

Resumes are very important. If it is sloppy has lots of spelling mistakes, does not make sense, more than likely your potential employer will feel like this is a reflection of you. Therefore, DON’T BE SLOPPY & Let someone look over your resume!!!

MOMENT OF FRIES:

I was able to spend some wonderful quality time with my best friend Regine!!! HEY BOO!!! She blessed me and took me out to eat at Outback Steakhouse in Cary, NC!!! & You’ll know what I ordered: FRENCH FRIES!!! OMG they were AMAZING!!!!

They were fully cooked to perfection, CRISP, and well seasoned. They came out hot and fresh!!! Fist Pumps to the chef!!!

Even if God opens doors, make sure that you are a good representative. Make yourself, your employer, and make GOD PROUD!!! Even though the Holy Spirit has ministered to me to stay focused it is still my responsibility to be prepared and wait in expectation to walk through the door, with my head held HIGH, Stilettos on my feet, pearls on my neck, lip gloss on my lips, and resume in hand!!!

I am still waiting for God to open that door but I’m sure its coming!!!!

Peace, Blessings, and ENJOY FRIES WITH LIFE!!!!

Fife=Fries with Life: On The Job Search

Because life has happened... IM EXPANDING

Fife=Fries with life!!

You have a degree; I promise you will be making $500,000.00 a year. Yes you will be in the “President Obama wants more of your money bracket.” –NOPE that’s false. After getting married, relocating, and quitting my job I have learned a lot about searching for a job. So on my quest of wanting to be exposed more to fries… I must be on a quest to get a job so I can afford the quest for my fry’s… lol

JOB SEARCHING 101- according to FIFE…

Things I Have Learned While Looking for a Job 

• You will hear NO or nothing at all, but someone will say YES
• You must remain positive and keep positive people around; there will be many hard days (Try not to let the “No’s” affect your self-esteem. You are great, you are just undiscovered. Don’t let the comments “You need to get a job now” by your family and close people around you make you feel as if you are worthless. Don’t let the fact that you don’t score the job right away and cant go out like you use to make you depressed. Explore fun home activities. Life can get boring and depressing when you don’t have money, but try to keep it fun and interesting! The fun part is hanging out with friends who are always happy and are more optimistic during these moments in life!! Friends who may come over and bring some chips and wine and grab a redbox verses asking you to go the movies!!)

• YOU MUST NETWORK, no matter how uncomfortable this maybe.  (I have found that my anxiety level in meeting new people has increased because I always want to put my best foot forward and of course SCORE A JOB!!! I sometimes put sooo much pressure of perfection on myself because of the burden of employment that I don’t get to enjoy my network or meeting new people. But this has to be done!!! Don’t be intimidated, breathe, relax!!!)

Common Myths on the Job Search 

•  I don’t have the skills they are looking for (Honey Boo-Boo YES YOU DO)
•  I can only find a job through the Internet (Statistics prove this wrong)
• If I send my resume they will see how AMAZING I am (lol…we would all have jobs)
• I’m Overqualified (No we can all work at McDonalds)

In the beginning of my job search I was very hopeful, excited, motivated, looking for that good pay so that I could pay all my bills, go shopping and take some well deserved and well needed vacations. HOWEVA….

No one really warned me on the work that I must put in, the positivity it takes, the writing skills, and the patience I would gain while on this journey. So what did I do, probably what the rest of the world did: INTERNET JOB SEARCH…lol

www.Indeed.com; www.monsterjobs.com; www.snagajob.com; www.ziprecruiter.com; www.Christianjobs.com; you name it I was on it. What did it yield me NOTHING!!!!! Absolutely NOTHING!!!!

I have experience, I was willing to do anything even be a bank teller, janitor, administrative assistant, anything. Well as bills started piling, credit plummeting, no more help from family, and being stretched to the max, I was at my lowest point and could not see my way out. What did I do? I started calling friends and family and began to meet with the career center at Duke!!! JACKPOT!!!! Even though I still have not landed any employment I am hopeful and would like to share or at least begin to share what has been shared with me!!! Be blessed and pray that the right job finds me, as I am search for it!!! 

1.  Who are YOU? So this is most important!!!! What you bring to the table, your experience, your skills, and how you present them to match up to what the employer needs is very important. YOU MUST I repeat YOU MUST make sure that on your resume, during the interview, you find what they need and you tweak yourself to become JUST THAT!!!! But if you don’t know what you bring to the table and how to sell yourself…no one is going to want you!!! :/
2. Have a strategy! What DUKE calls a having a TARGETED SEARCH: I was applying to any and every thing. Do not do that. Know where you want to work, what you want to do, what location, and even identify the top 10 organizations you would like to work for and then hit those hard. I know you have an immediate need, most people do, but it is about creating long term revenue. Keep in contact with your bill collectors let them know as soon as you can make a payment you will.
3. Research & Preparation: After you have sought out your companies its time to research them. You need to know the ends and outs of the company as much as possible. This is possibly where you allow the Internet to work on your behalf. Twitter, Facebook, and even Google, find out what is new and trending for the company. See who has possibly started new projects, promotions, etc.a.     Then use the information to setup informational interviews, to make good networking contacts, send out emails, make phone calls etc. Once you are in the informational interview this information you have gathered during your research will come in handy. J BLINGGGGG!!!
4. RESUME: By the end of this process you will have tons of resumes… maybe even hundreds. Each resume must be individualized for each job position you are applying for. Key words, key phrases, job descriptions, etc all must be tailored for each resume. I will do a whole blog over resumes!!! RESUME WRITING IS INTENSE!!!
5.  Network: Contact people. Past professors, past employers, mentors, aunts, uncles, cousins, distant relatives, friends, EVERYBODY. Please do not feel that you are using them because you are…lol… just kidding. Really you are building a network of support a web of hope. Somebody out there knows someone who knows someone who has the perfect position for you. You just have to find that person, seek them out, sell yourself, and hopefully you will be exposed to the JOB!!!

I hope that you are encouraged if you too are in my position and searching for employment. If you are on the verge of graduation, start preparing now!!! Peace, Blessings, and ENJOY FRIES WITH LIFE!!!!